Authenticity in the Art of Relationships

July 6, 2022

“To the world you may be one person; but to one person you may be the world.”

            -Dr. Seuss

I absolutely adore this quote. It’s made me feel special when I’ve struggled with relationships. It’s given me hope. I think it encapsulates so many things that I feel about my loved ones and I hope others feel for theirs.

But, also? Woof. It’s a lot of freaking pressure to be the whole entire world for someone.

I am the first one to turn to my hubby and say, “You are my everything.” And I love it when he says it to me, it warms my whole heart. But I also sometimes think back to when we were first dating and he would want to spend time with his friends alone or with his family alone and I would get so jealous and frustrated. If I am your everything, shouldn’t you want me to be with you all the time, twenty-four seven, constantly with you for every interaction you could possibly have? Isn’t that what it means to be everything for someone? Can’t I fulfill your every need for human interaction?

Of course not. And as I looked at my life I realized I didn’t just feel this with Domi, I’ve felt it with other family members and friends too. I wanted to be all they needed. I wanted to fit every bill and I wanted them to be that for me. But, we all have a plethora of magically unique relationships and each one serves a specific purpose and allows the delicate ecosystems that are our lives to thrive.

It’s also such a weight off of our shoulders. Not having to be everything for someone and not expecting someone to be absolutely everything for us allows us to show up as our authentic selves in each of our relationships. We’re no longer beholden to being everything for someone. We don’t need to be a parent, partner, friend for a laugh, friend that likes to party, friend that you can sit quietly with, friend who you can vent to, friend you can talk about politics and religion with, friend who you can travel with. I mean, what a relief, right? I don’t need to fulfill every want and need in all of my relationships, I can just be me and my loved ones can just be themselves.

Instead of trying to be everything for everyone, we can start to hone into what we bring to relationships and really lean on those incredible qualities each of us inherently contains. It’s actually a really cool experience. We get to first dive in and figure out what we love to naturally bring to relationships, what we want more of in our lives, and start to consciously curate relationships that don’t expect everyone to be everything and allow ourselves to just be really good at the things we naturally love to do and be anyway.

We can start accepting ourselves for who we are, accepting others for who they are, and loving them just as they are right now. We don’t need to ask people to change for us anymore nor do we have to change ourselves for anyone else and that feels really, really good.

Happy July friends, do me a favor for my birthday month and just go out into the world and be unapologetically, inexplicably YOU!

I love you, my heart is with you. XOXO, CAMDW

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